La-la-la-la-la... I'm not listening anymore!

Is it just me, or are anxiety levels rising everywhere over gift giving this holiday season?

If you want to be PC (or safe!), you won't buy any products made in China. If you want to keep your budget in line, you won't buy anything on credit. If you want to avoid the crowds, shop early and/or shop online. But if you want to support your local economy, you won't buy online... and probably not at Wal-Mart because it doesn't seem to count as local, never mind that people who live in your town work there. And don't forget, if you want to be green, or care about the environment the least little bit, you simply won't buy a bunch of STUFF for the holidays.

Perhaps it's time to just cover my ears and start la-la-la-la-la-ing rather than pay attention to one more iota of advice. I'm not the greatest shopper anyway, and just thinking about it this year has left me feeling paralyzed with indecision. I don't want to be a bad person. I don't want to carelessly tromp all over the environment or support inhumane working conditions or be the reason mom and pop shops in my town are shutting down or blow my budget or give my kids toxic toys. And you know what? I typically buy about a quarter of the crap I see other people leaving the store with anyway... so why am I wasting my time listening to people tell me to keep the holidays simple?

All this pressure to make conscientious decisions is making me want to just throw all caution to the wind and buy, buy, buy. At least, that's what I thought was happening when I headed out to shop tonight. Instead, I ended up leaving four different stores without a single purchase in hand. In the fifth store (okay, Wal-Mart) I managed to finally find at least a couple of items I was looking for.

I'm going to close my ears to all the advice. I don't care anymore. I will shop, as usual, with each kid in mind, but no more. I'll aim for that gift that lights them up from the inside out.

I'm done with holiday shopping tips.

I'm done with driving store to store and leaving empty handed.

What can't be found from the comfort of my own chair isn't worth finding at this point.

I'll fill the stockings with fun, even if not entirely worthwhile or sustainable fun.

And I won't feel guilty about it.

None of it.

Anymore.