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Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Hardtack for Lunch

Each day I tell myself I'm going to take/make the time for a blog post. Then I sit to do so and stumble over what I want to say. A dozen "drafts" sit unpublished. Time to just let it all hang out, I guess. Forget edits. Forget rewording till the words flow. I haven't written that way in ages anyway.

Munchkin Boy made hardtack for lunch the other day. It was surprisingly tasty. He made a plain version, then a whole grain version. I'm actually craving more of it at this moment. He's been reading books on gardening and cooking. He made me bruschetta for breakfast this morning. It was wonderful. Better, even, than the hardtack.

When life gets as busy as it is right now, I have this little fear that these are the things I am going to forget. No blogging. Barely any paper journals either. Will I look back one day and see that 2010 was an enormous void? Will I be able to recall any of the wonders of these days from memory?

I guess I don't trust my memory. Perhaps that is why I have always written as I have.

Work as the Farmers Market manager is going well. It's funny that I was making these twice weekly outings prior to working, but having a name and a face in the community has changed things greatly. It was easy to go out before and either be with the crowd or chose to remain alone. I wasn't expected. I wasn't missed. So few people knew me by name.

I've been writing for a client for a couple of years now. I just learned his last name this summer. That's the kind of world I've been existing in. Nameless/faceless. He knows my name because I write it at the top of my articles. Why I never picked up his, I'm not entirely sure. He's pays electronically and always on time. There was never a need to know more, I suppose.

I like having a name and a face. On occasion I suppose I miss the anonymity. But this has been a good move. Kinks remain to be worked out, of course. But I am getting there. Day by day. Moment by moment.

So yes, I'm still writing as the assignments keep coming. And the market work is regular, but should slow soon.

I got my bike tire fixed after nearly a week and a half of not riding. I miss the riding. Only a week and a half, and a dozen excuses to be elsewhere, but I am eager to get back on and ride.

The wind is blowing here today. Windy days always take me back in time, across the state to my childhood. The movement of the air like this feels natural. It makes me feel real and alive. I have some video clips from our last trip to western Kansas. Sometimes I forget about the wind blowing like that. All the time. My low maintenance approach to hair care explained.

Today when I crawled back inside after standing out in the wind for most of the late afternoon, I was struck by how silent it was. I turned on fans to make the air move again. I listened to my thoughts and wondered where the music of the air had gone, a background rhythm for the steady rush and swell of thoughts inside my head.

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