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Friday, May 18, 2007

How to Get Along with Me


  • Give me plenty of compliments. They mean a lot to me.
  • Be a supportive friend or partner. Help me to learn to love and value myself.
  • Respect me for my special gifts of intuition and vision.
  • Though I don't always want to be cheered up when I'm feeling melancholy, I sometimes like to have someone lighten me up a little.
  • Don't tell me I'm too sensitive or that I'm overreacting!

I can't say that I necessarily like the way it sums me up, but I have to admit that it's probably fairly accurate. I am a four according to The New Enneagram test... a person who is sensitive, warm and perceptive.

What I Like About Being a Four

  • my ability to find meaning in life and to experience feeling at a deep level
  • my ability to establish warm connections with people
  • admiring what is noble, truthful, and beautiful in life
  • my creativity, intuition, and sense of humor
  • being unique and being seen as unique by others
  • having aesthetic sensibilities
  • being able to easily pick up the feelings of people around me


What's Hard About Being a Four

  • experiencing dark moods of emptiness and despair
  • feelings of self-hatred and shame; believing I don't deserve to be loved
  • feeling guilty when I disappoint people
  • feeling hurt or attacked when someone misundertands me
  • expecting too much from myself and life
  • fearing being abandoned
  • obsessing over resentments
  • longing for what I don't have


Fours as Children Often

  • have active imaginations: play creatively alone or organize playmates in original games
  • are very sensitive
  • feel that they don't fit in
  • believe they are missing something that other people have
  • attach themselves to idealized teachers, heroes, artists, etc.
  • become antiauthoritarian or rebellious when criticized or not understood
  • feel lonely or abandoned (perhaps as a result of a death or their parents' divorce)


Fours as Parents

  • help their children become who they really are
  • support their children's creativity and originality
  • are good at helping their children get in touch with their feelings
  • are sometimes overly critical or overly protective
  • are usually very good with children if not too self-absorbed

I scored equally high as a three (achiever), five (observer), and eight (asserter). Those were my second highest scores, though not nearly as high as my score as a four.

What is an Enneagram?

So just out of curiosity, what are you?

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I scored a very strong '4'. (10). The only other two that even had a positive number in the column were '5' which I got 5 points on, so was my second highest. And '3', which had only 1 point. The rest were all negatives.

Melissa said...

I was a a 5 and a 7 equally (4s). Interesting quiz!

Derek the Great said...

My top numbers are for 5 and 8--I am a cerebral leader! Go me! But then I look at the "parent" descriptions. We are caring and involved, but:

Fives as Parents ... are sometimes authoritarian and demanding.

Eights as Parents ... can be demanding, controlling, and rigid.

Fairly accurate, and chilling.