Ever wonder...

what happened to that guy you had a huge crush on back in the seventh grade? You know, the one who rode in the back of the bus. The bad boy with the gorgeous brown eyes, long lashes, and thick curly hair. The one who took you riding in his car when you were supposed to be sleeping over at your friend’s house. He drove too fast, but boy did he smell great. You remember him, right?

Well, he’s gay.

And all that wonderful dark hair?

Gone. He’s either bald, or thinning so badly he just keeps a close shave for comfort.

This is just one of the myriad of things you can discover on the Internet. Don’t accuse me of wasting time… there were a dozen things I needed to do this afternoon, but occasionally you just have to call it a day off and go surfing.

See, I also discovered that my friend from Sunday School (circa second grade) is divorced with two kids, but still going to church. And I found about a half-dozen members of my high school graduating class (admittedly, I have not a single memory of at least two-thirds of them), and at least a couple handfuls of people who graduated from KU the same year that I did (nearly all of them claiming to make a lot more money than I do).

I read some poetry by an old acquaintance I never would have considered to have had a poetic bone in his body and saw some weight loss photos of an old friend that will totally change the memories I have of the guy (Good/bad? I haven’t decided yet.)

I’ve talked about the Internet as a place for forging friendships… but it can also be a heck of a spot for just picking up trivial facts about people who, more or less, mean nothing to you. What a world we live in.

Once on this train, however, I started thinking about the stuff people who might remember my name could find out on a day when they have nothing better to do than to waste precious hours online. So I Googled myself. If you’ve never done so, you ought to. (For the uninitiated, it’s not as dirty as it sounds.) Very curious, the stuff that comes up when you type in a name.

If you knew me in high school, for instance, and started with a search of my maiden name --- yep, my website comes up second on the list! Search me by my married name, however, and you find all sorts of fun that isn’t actually me. Do you think, for instance, that people might assume I am the no-longer-active, about.com expert on Jennifer Aniston?

Would they be impressed to find me in the directory of Who’s Who in Leadership of the United States?

How about my fitness site? Or an advocate for children’s health?

Once upon a time, a top Google hit was a lovely nude model who shared my name. She’s apparently fallen in rank since I last had this much time to waste.

Anyway, I really did have stuff to do today. Enough contemplating just where my ego might have taken me… if I’d only crushed on a guy who’d been straight enough to give me the time of day.

If you ever decide to look me up, Chuck, just know that I’ll never forget. It was a thrill while it lasted. I moved on… and, now that I know, (thank you cyber-gods) I’m over it ;-)